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July 10, 2006

Gooooooooaaaal!

Only one this is more fun than watching the French being defeated in some sporting endeavour. Watching it in a Frecnh bar.

A brief recap of the world cup:

6 minutes: Owner of said bar hands us a large stack serviettes so we may dry our eyes when France scores from a dubious penalty kick. Deafening applause.

19 minutes: Italy scores from a corner kick. Two people clap. 1-1.

45 minutes: We conclude that the Italy is playing a solid defence game and that France is not good at corner kicks after several uninspiring attempts.

63 minutes: Luca Toni, yet to score in the tournament, heads a goal from a penalty kick. Its ruled offside. Not entirely convinced that was a good call.

110 minutes: Zidane, to the astonishment of all, whilst the ball is not in play, headbuts someone in the chest. He did it out of sight of the ref, but was snagged as the Italians asked that the ref consult the linesman, who did see it. Several French are so appalled they applaud lightly as he gets a red card. What an incredibly stupid way to end your final match. France completes the game one man down.

Penalty shootouts: On the second kick, France hits the bar and fails to post the goal. Whilst they move the ball to the other end of the field for the next Italian shot, the serviettes are redistributed to the other tables.

People finish their drinks and quietly file out of the bar to mourn. The TV is packed away. The French flag is removed shortly after its suggested they replace the blue stripe with a green one.

When is the Tour de France?

Scrawled illegibly by Meathe at July 10, 2006 10:36 AM

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